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Two North Korean Love Stories which Put the “Cute” into “Meet Cute” (Pt. 2)

January 14, 2018 by Tongil Tours

By Alek Sigley.

In the last instalment on the novel Friend by Paek Nam Ryong we looked at how Ri Sŏk Ch’un, the lathe operator, met his wife, the singer, Ch’ae Sun Hŭi. The story is told through a flashback to the past. Now they are married, have a young son, and are seeking divorce through the local People’s Court judge Chŏng Jin U.

The narrative also contains a section where Chŏng Jin U recounts how he met his now-wife, Han Ŭn Ok. It provides many an insight into North Korean society, in particular, the outlook of North Korea’s educated class. In the section where Chŏng Jin U gives his thesis presentation, I have directly translated much of the text, rather than summarise it, as in the rest of the post. This is because it is a considerably unique look at North Korean historiography and social science, and therefore might be of academic interest to some out there.

Paek Nam Ryong Friend North Korea Fiction Novel Judge

Chŏng Jin U in his office, looking pensive.

It all started twenty years ago, in the autumn. Chŏng Jin U was presenting his thesis in the university lecture hall. It was in order for him to advance to fifth year in the law faculty.

The title of the thesis was “A Legal Study of Marriage in Human History”. It was a very broad topic to take on for an undergraduate thesis, but he did his best to write it according to the dialectical materialist perspective that the historians had pioneered in studying the history of marriage. He’d shown it to some of his comrades in the dormitory and they had said that it had academic value and was excellent for something written by a university student.

So he stood at the lectern, ready to give his presentation. The lecture theatre was full. There were students from the law faculty, and other departments too. Thesis presentations were listed in notices, and placed up on campus walls. Law student presentations were often able to cross disciplinary boundaries and thus draw wide interest from across the campus.

In the front row was Yun Hŭi, a student known amongst her peers in the law faculty as “Bee Sting”. She flashed Chŏng Jin U a somewhat contemptuous smile. It was clear that no matter how logical and well-written his thesis is, she’ll find some chink in its armour to attack it through.

Next to Yun Hŭi sat a young woman he didn’t recognise. She sent him a warm, soft look, in which he read curiosity and perhaps even admiration. The young woman’s tender gaze left a deep impression inside his heart. He glanced at her one more time before lowering his head to begin reading his thesis.

“During the days of humanity’s youth…”

He then described how the institution of marriage changed in form as society’s mode of production evolved, starting with hunter gatherer society, where early humans lived in tropical and sub-tropical forests, forming tribes that took shelter in caves. In such times, there was not yet any gender-based division of labour. This is a time long before even the Paleolithic era. Humans had just evolved from advanced animals and had begun walking upright, but had not yet discovered fire or learned to use sticks or stone axes as tools.

During this time the prevailing form of marriage was collective marriage. The people of the time faced ferocious beasts, the inestimable wildness of nature, and food shortages, and were thus forced into tight-knit communities. These people had a weak moral spirit. Barely distinguishing themselves from the wild they lived in, to follow their base instincts was “morality”. There was no need nor possibility for regulation of such a marital system.

As humans began to learn to use fire and basic wooden and stone implements, we entered the Paleolithic period. These led to the formation of matriarchal clans. The collective marriage of this time was that in which the children only knew their mothers, and thus lineage was calculated through the matrilineal line.

However, people began to feel the insult and shame of collective marriage, and it began to narrow its confines to a more progressed form limited to within individual households. Marriage between siblings was also made taboo. These matrilineal clans developed from the middle of the Paleolithic era to the end of the Neolithic.

As population density and economic productivity increased, spiritual development in these matrilineal clan societies was achieved. This led to conflict between the women who wanted to progress to a more dignified system of marriage, and the men who wouldn’t readily abandon the base pleasures of collective marriage. Finally, collective marriage gave way to a form of polygamous marriage where the children still belonged to the mother. This was a “legal” victory for women, despite containing the vestiges of collective marriage.

It wasn’t until the late-Neolithic and Bronze Age that monogamy, i.e. one husband one wife-style marriages appeared. This was a time when animal husbandry and agriculture were developed, and reshaped the structure of human society. Men became more dominant because they provided the muscle necessary for tilling the fields etc. They began to bring wife and children over to their side, and lineage and inheritance was traced through the paternal side.

This was followed by a shift to a patriarchal society, development of iron implements, further increases in productivity, division of labour, surplus product, private ownership, commercial goods, exchange, exploitation, and the formation of social classes…

The state, which was the product of class conflict, created the legal system as a means to protect the private ownership of the ruling classes and oppress the working class. Law, a weapon of state power which serves the interests of the exploiting class, is essentially no different to the customs, culture, and clan meetings-based decision making of primitive and clan society.

The legal code of ancient Sumer, and the 16th century BC Babylonian Code of Hammurabi, which was its inheritor, delineates marriage law alongside criminal and civil law. These ancient legal codes proscribed prostitution and adultery not in order to promote a healthier morality, but for the purposes of consolidating private property.

This consolidation of private property led to the subjection of woman to the patriarchy, in the family and in broader society, making them economically, politically, and ideologically subservient. Entering feudal society, marital relations operated within coercion and submission under the influence of wealth, status, and power. This developed towards a situation where women’s subjectivity and human rights were trampled upon. In the case of legal codes such as the Koryŏ Era “Sangchŏngryemun”, or the Ri Dynasty “Kyŏngguktaejŏn“…

Upon reaching here, Chŏng Jin U took a drink of water and looked at the people in the lecture theatre. The haughtiness on the “Bee Sting’s” face had disappeared without a trace. Instead, he saw a look of surprise. She had not expected such an erudite presentation, having up until now dismissed Chŏng Jin U as dilettante who only did a little bit of study. However, the girl sitting next to her, who had at the beginning sent him a friendly look, now sat stone-faced and serious.

The listeners, who sat without focus as if enveloped in a white fog, were like witnesses who had borne testament to tens of thousands of years of marriage’s most difficult history. Not living witnesses, rather, they themselves were direct descendants of the ever-evolving forms of marriage.

After a round applause for his efforts, most left the lecture theatre. The two girls in the front row approached Chŏng Jin U. Yun Hŭi was effusive in her praise of his presentation, and uncharacteristically, could find no flaws to point out. She then introduces her friend as Han Ŭn Ok, a distance student in the biology faculty from faraway Yŏnsudŏk, adding that Ŭn Ok did have an opinion that she would like to express on Chŏng Jin U’s thesis. However, when Chŏng Jin U asks her to express her thoughts, she just blushes, praises his work and avoids saying anything. She then leaves with Yun Hŭi.

Find out what happens next in Part 3! What suggestions does Ŭn Ok have for Chŏng Jin U’s thesis? And will they get together? Well of course they will! I did mention it at the beginning of this post…

Filed Under: The North Korea Blog

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Edward Voet
Edward Voet
2018-08-10T06:39:33+0000
The tour was extremely well-managed and organised. Not only did we visit the significant cultural landmarks, we were... also able to develop a sense of what life is like for the average North Korean citizen. The tour guides were extremely amicable and easy to get along with, as were all other members of the tour. Alek is very friendly and a great person to have on the tour given his experience with running tours in North Korea. The positive relationship between Tongil Tours and the tour company in North Korea was very obvious. At no time were we made to feel unsafe, and the restrictions on taking photos were no more strict than in any other country (no photos in places of high security). Some highlights included the Pyongyang Circus, Kumsusan Palace of the Sun, natural sightseeing in rural areas, and visiting local schools. I highly recommend this tour for those who are looking to learn more about the history of the Korean peninsula, gain an extremely unique perspective on the situation in North Korea, and have a genuinely enjoyable cultural experience.read more
Isaac Beers
Isaac Beers
2018-05-22T11:31:10+0000
Wouldn't travel to the DPRK with anyone else. Incredibly knowledgeable and dedicated people who really care about... cultural exchange and education. We thoroughly enjoyed our 5 day tour, would have liked to have been able to stay longer.read more
Jonny Garrison
Jonny Garrison
2018-02-12T03:52:52+0000
These guys were amazing, trip of a lifetime Nikolai was such an honest cool bloke, the Korean guides were so... knowledgeable, so many of the myths were broken down, it was eye opening! Great value and being a small group we got to see things that the other larger groups couldn’t, highlights for me were definitely the palace and New Year’s Eve in the square roaming amongst thousands of locals. Being vegan as well I was a little concerned I’d just have cabbage and rice for dinner but far from it the food was so varied and amazing, I will hopefully return to do the marathon .read more
Cat Yen
Cat Yen
2018-01-20T16:40:00+0000
Alek from Tongil Tours provided an incredible trip around Seoul. It is difficult to imagine anybody with comparable... knowledge of South Korea and North Korea's history and culture, which allowed him to infuse all the historical sites we went to, natural vistas we hiked and even the food we ate with context and meaning -- it was never just a matter of visiting a palace, or a temple. Tongil Tours put together an extremely varied itinerary, ranging from tours of palaces, temples, art galleries, markets, mountain hiking, shopping and 'trend' areas, traditional communities, gardens and a variety of restaurants (all of which were either famous, historically significant or just delicious in their own right). Particularly great was Alek's deep knowledge of North Korean affairs, which allowed him to offer alternative perspectives and balance the sometimes biased information at places like museums. Moreover, Alek was extremely accommodating to my particular interests and tailored the trip accordingly (for example, by including extra trips to temples due to my particular interest in Buddhism) and was happy to revisit sites I enjoyed particularly (for example, visiting a certain local dessert vendor more than once). Alek's fluency in South Korean and his many years of residing in South Korea means that Tongil Tours can provide an unparallelled experience -- thank you Tongil Tours!read more
Bronwen Dalton
Bronwen Dalton
2017-12-09T01:04:52+0000
Gennady Yartsev
Gennady Yartsev
2017-10-12T19:33:06+0000
I visited Seoul late August 2017 and had luck of having a Tongil Tours guide expert giving me a tour around the city.... This remarkable tour included both must-see historical landmarks and authentic local specialties experiences, all being provided with in-depth commentary only a professional Korean-speaking scholar could give, including information on historical, culinary and modern popular culture backround of places visited and seen. A memorable part of my journey was visiting the Demilitarized Zone at the South-North Korean border. Being an academic expert on North-Korean studies who has visited the other side of the border much more than just once, the tour guide provided unbiased context on history of tragic division of a once united country and first-hand information about the current state of affairs, a perspective one can find hard to achieve relying on traditional tour guides available for booking at any hotel lobby. Altogether Tongil Tours made my visit extremely informative and fun at the same time, I am looking forward for my North Korea trip which I hope will happen soon.read more
Yuka  Morinaga
Yuka Morinaga
2017-08-13T14:03:12+0000
平壌だけでなく、開城・元山・咸興・海州・金剛山など各地の名所を巡りました。開城の参鶏湯と、元山のはまぐり焼きがおすすめです。平壌で人気のカフェに行ったり、現地の大学生と交流したり、リクエストに応じて旅程をアレンジできました。トンイルツアー... のガイドさんの流暢な朝鮮語と、現地の歴史・社会・文化に対する豊富な知識のおかげで、北朝鮮に対する理解を深めることができ、楽しく旅行することができました!北朝鮮現地のフレンドリーなガイドさんは、こちらのリクエストに応えるために尽力してくださったり、現地の生活のことをいろいろ教えてくださったりしました。ありがとうございました!また参加したいです。read more
Tay B.k.
Tay B.k.
2017-04-20T07:15:20+0000
Cez Krol
Cez Krol
2017-03-18T22:04:51+0000
I visited North Korea on a private tour with my friend - Agness (see our blog - etramping). Since we remember, North... Korea has been always on the top of our bucket list. As we all know, you can't get into the country without a reputable tour company, so were more than happy to let Tongil Tours guide us throughout this unique and intense experience. We decided to travel with Tongil Tours for the sake of their cause - bridging the communication gap between North Korean locals and foreigners - as well as their impressive educational background. With Tongil Tour we were able to learn more about the history and culture of North Korea while attending sites of interest as well as lectures. Our whole North Korean experience was a great balance of fun and education. During the whole trip, we were accompanied by 4 people: Joey - our American guide from Tongil Tours, Ms Hong - North Korean guide who has lived in Cuba for 7 years, Ms Oh - North Korean guide who has lived in Libya for 7 years, Mr Lee - our North Korean driver. We were very glad that they all turned out to be kind-hearted, funny and well-educated people with whom we enjoyed plenty of laughter and a lot of insights into their everyday lives and international experience they all gathered when studying and living in the DPRK and abroad. We felt like one big family towards the end of our trip. Having great guides was the best thing that could happen to us, because otherwise, it may have been very difficult to go through the experience. Special thanks to Joey for keeping us entertained and giving us the insider knowledge about everything we experienced with his funny anecdotes, fascinating stories and interesting facts about North Korea. Thanks to Tongil Tours, we had an opportunity to attend Kimchi cooking class, a local magic show, go bowling where we could get closer to locals - places and activities not every visitor is offered to see/do - and visit a portion of the North Korean DMZ. Moreover, we've visited local cafeterias (we love coffee and these guys knew that), went for an electric tram ride around Pyongyang and had plenty of fun once we got to the bar where we could try different local beers - chocolate, coffee, and rice flavoured. This trip has also turned into a real culinary experience. We were all served freshly chopped or pickled veggies, high-quality meat such as grilled duck, chicken broth, eggs, fresh fruits. We were also eating a lot of rice cakes and bread, but it was nice to have so many healthy options to choose from in each meal. One of our favourite meals in North Korea was naengmyeon, AKA cold noodles, served a large stainless-steel bowl with a tangy iced broth with pickled cucumbers, wide strips of lightly pickled radish, a boiled egg and slices of cold beef. If you are looking for a unique experience in North Korea, we highly recommend travelling with Tongil Tours. We are happy for building up this relationship and would like to travel with them in the future.read more
Travis Jeppesen
Travis Jeppesen
2017-03-13T08:35:07+0000
I was on the first language course in Pyongyang in 2016 and can highly recommend it. It definitely gave me more of an... insider's view on life in the DPRK capital than previous trips I'd taken to the country.read more
Alex Curylo
Alex Curylo
2017-03-07T00:04:21+0000
Took the train in from Beijing and plane out to Shenyang in late February 2017, visiting the Koguryo and Kaesong WHS... sites as well as the regular Pyongyang+DMZ showcase sights. Tongil did an EXCELLENT job of scheduling the visit to cover everything thoroughly, and picked wonderful guides as well. Unconditionally recommended.read more
Bill Sykes
Bill Sykes
2016-09-01T18:38:34+0000
I enjoyed a great experience when I toured the DPRK in 2016 I felt safe and secure and welcome at all times Everything... ran smoothly thanks to Tongil Tours- Peter Sukonek and local guide Miss Hong who was very on the ball ! I now have a better understanding of their perspective I hope that Korea may be reunited democratically in the future Bill Sykesread more
Alex Selth
Alex Selth
2016-08-08T13:42:24+0000
8 days in the DPRK in July 2016. I studied North Korea at university, but you can't really understand a place until you... visit. Our tour took us to four major cities and an assortment of other fascinating sites, with some of the best guides and tour management I've experienced. Alek is hugely knowledgeable and deeply experienced with the country, and went out of his way to make sure our trip was memorable, fascinating, and surprisingly tasty!read more
William Sima
William Sima
2016-07-15T01:42:48+0000
A trip to the DPRK challenges the senses and the mind, and will leave the visitor with a more informed attitude to this... country and, by implication, one's own country and worldview. On the one hand visitors will find the isolated, feudal-Stalinist dystopia they've heard and read about. You will feel something of the psychological abuse to which this odious regime subjects its people, the obscurantism and hysterics of the DPRK's official historical and political discourse, and the tragic damage that decades of isolation can wreak on the minds of even the well-educated. On the other hand there are fathomable historical reasons why North Korea is the way that it is, reasons which differ greatly from the "crazy/evil" line in our own media and public discourse. But most importantly — as is surely true of any country — there is more to the DPRK than politics. With a population of 24 million North Korea has at least one thing in common with Australia, and our one week tour confirmed for me the truth that, politics aside, human beings all share essentially the same concerns and aspirations in their lives. Tour operator Alek, a student of Korean language, history and culture, does an outstanding job in helping visitors grapple with the emotional and intellectual challenges of this country. This work begins in the weeks before departure, with Alek providing academic and more general background readings and optional lectures about the country and what to expect. Once there, you're told some quite outlandish things at museums, historic sites and places of Kim-worship; how valuable to have somebody at hand, however discreetly, to help you make sense of what you're hearing and steer you closer towards the truth. Alek's command of the language helped our group break the ice when talking to people on the street, and on the train out to Dandong, it helped lighten the atmosphere and defuse a rather tense situation with austere customs officials — I don't know what I would have done if by myself! Mandarin speakers should also note that there are similarities between the two languages and Alek, who knows both of them, can explain the Korean via the Chinese — which makes everything from place names to propaganda slogans infinitely easier to remember. But most importantly, from the beaches at Wonsan to school classrooms, hotel bars, bowling alleys and the Pyongyang metro, the language factor made it possible to engage, however fleetingly, with the Korean people, in whose country we were guests for one week. The few (western — there are many Chinese) tour groups we encountered did not have the luxury of such interpretation, on both the linguistic and cultural/historical levels, that Alek provides with Tongil Tours. In hindsight, I can't imagine what it would have been like to be at the mercy of just our Korean guides, or — much worse — of other unscrupulous tour operators who sell this country as a "weird" Other for privileged westerners to gawk at "for thrills". Considering the difficulties inherent in making it to the DPRK and the challenges the country presents, I'd advise anybody to consider Tongil Tours to get the most from their precious time there.read more
Iga Morzyńska
Iga Morzyńska
2016-05-08T16:30:55+0000
I went on a tour to North Korea in September 2015 and it was definitely a very valuable and unforgettable experience.... Alek is truly passionate about what he is doing and he definitely did a great job in making me really interested in North Korea. He is very knowledgeable and also very patient in answering any questions we had during the tour. I did not have any expectations prior going to North Korea, but I came back with a lot more knowledge and understanding of the North Korean culture and society. Thanks to our amazing tour guides, we were able to see much more than only Pyongyang. We got to visit a local school, and even participate in class and teach the kids some English songs. We were also able to visit the War museum, which for me was one of the highlights of the tour. Honestly speaking, before going to North Korea I imagined it to be a very isolated, secluded place, I was very positively surprised when it all turned out to be untrue, when we had a chance to interact with the local people during visits to the skate park or the amusement park. I would absolutely recommend it to any open-minded person who is willing to open up for new perspectives and look beyond the common convictions about the DPRK, I can guarantee you to learn a lot during the tour and come back with a rewarding new experience and point of view. I felt 100% safe and wouldn’t mind going back there again one day!read more
Airi Tsukada
Airi Tsukada
2016-04-02T02:30:36+0000
James Enderby
James Enderby
2015-07-29T06:45:02+0000
James Enderby – 5 star I went with Tongil Tours to the Democratic Peoples Republic of Korea (DPPK) in July for 7 days.... I had a fantastic time. I enjoyed the Korean food, circus, dancing and singing. Our DPPK guide Mrs Hong was excellent and spoke extremely good English as well as some Spanish. One of the best things about the trip was that we were given the opportunity to see multiple cities in the DPPK including Pyongyang, Kaesong and several others. The other thing that made the trip worth while was that unlike other tours, Tongil tours provided an Australian academic on the trip. Alek Sigley, our Australian Academic from ANU, (who is an expert in Korean studies) gave a whole new perspective on the country. He gave us the chance to ask far more question to educate us about the DPPK. Furthermore the trip provides tourists with the chance to dispel myths and prejudices about the DPPK (again largely due to the fact that Tongil Tours provides an Australian Academic on the DPPK). All in all I would rate Tongil Tours 5 stars. Jamesread more
David Pritts
David Pritts
2015-07-29T00:02:50+0000
The trip was unique and unforgettable The small group atmosphere allowed for flexibility that catered to the interests... of the individual travelers. Besides "typical" attractions such as famous monuments, etc., some less traditional (and more fun) activities were on the agenda, such as ice skating with North Korean children, going out for North Korean beers, and visiting an amusement park. I would consider going again some day. Thanks!read more
Oliver Murrell
Oliver Murrell
2015-07-21T23:29:05+0000
I went on a Tongil Tours' trip to North Korea in September 2014. It was superbly organised and the trip was an... experience I will never forget. You really get to see the many different sides (good and bad) to North Korean culture and society. As well as learning a lot, the tour was very fun and the people in the group were certainly enjoyable. The tour guides were very friendly and helpful. This is truly a country like no other, and while of course I was a little concerned about travelling to this foreboding place, Tongil Tours made us all feel safe (mostly). I would highly recommend this to anyone who is curious about the Hermit Kingdom or has an eager sense of adventure. Pricing is very reasonable too, ideal for students in particular. Would definitely go again! :Dread more
George Martin
George Martin
2015-06-29T09:29:09+0000
I went on a trip to the 14th Pyongyang International Film Festival organised by Tongil Tours in autumn 2014, and I can... honestly say that it was one of my best (and most surreal!) holidays ever. The itinerary was interesting and varied and despite being somewhat apprehensive about what the tour might entail before setting out, I felt comfortable and safe throughout the entirety of the trip. Having looked at some other tour providers I am really happy that I settled with Tongil Tours – as well as being fun, the trip was also informative and educational. I loved how a real emphasis was placed on direct interactions with ordinary North Koreans, which Tongil Tours and our guide Alek did their best to facilitate at every opportunity. Alek was a fantastic guide – from the moment he met us at the airport in Beijing to when we parted, we never had any problems he couldn't deal with and he'd bend over backwards to help us out whenever we could (including scouring Pyongyang for a cup of decent coffee!). But most importantly he really helped us put everything we were seeing into context from an educated and balanced perspective. Alek's passion for North Korea is clear, and his knowledge of North Korea's history and culture and really helped bring the country to life. His language skills made talking to people a lot easier too, although it was surprising how many young people spoke at least rudimentary English. He was by no means a government propagandist, but it was his (and the tour/company in general's) emphasis on getting beyond the voyeurism in Western media's portrayal of North Korea that really made the holiday special. Of course, we got to see our fair share of communist kitsch, but what left the most lasting impression on me was just having simple conversations with ordinary people who we're led to believe are mindless robots, something which Alek did all he could to facilitate. Although they were naturally unable to give us as an objective a view of the country, our North Korean guides were also kind and helpful (yes, they do always follow you around, but once you get used to the idea that that's just the way it is and just get along with them then it doesn't feel intrusive). They were almost as keen to learn about the West as we were about North Korea, and by the end they felt like friends. Sharing a dirty joke with our guide Jong is something that will stay with me for a long time! Overall, I would highly recommend Tongil Tours to anyone thinking of visiting North Korea who wants to get that extra something out of their trip!read more

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